bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №85960
 22.08.2013
The Sakhalin Forum:
siyzzzinows: Maybe I misformulate... a thing so big - with slots for connecting network wires - hub?
GREG: Yes, the internet comes through the tubes in a liquid compressed form, and the hub heats it up and brings it to a steam-like state, and since the molecules of the internet are multi-colored - it is because of the rapid shooting of these molecules into the glass of the monitor that the image is obtained - i.e. The Internet you are used to. If you want to know anything else, contact me.

[ + 53 - ] Comment quote №85959
 22.08.2013
YouTube video, how from two pieces of sugar and vinegar to get electricity
The comments:
Swedish1991
I switched down the swimsuit to sugar, and in a couple of days the garage swimsuit itself, thank you the author for the video!!! to

Napoléon1
I tried. Connected the oatmeal, as the straw barely squeezed, the whole kitchen with vinegar, and sugar stumbled. It is necessary to warn that there is such a tension, even if the tester showed how much there is.

NeosGamer
He took 2 gazelles of sugar and healed K NEM the whole tank of Uksusa....Do you think he asked the house or the city? There is no fucking!! I asked the Sugar and Oxus Factory to get more electricity!

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №85958
 22.08.2013
News on RBC: "Krasnoyarsk doctors operated a man with a taburet in the head"
And you say, Chelyabinsk is a harsh city.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №85957
 22.08.2013
I have no phone today!
BBB: For what purpose?
AAA: He stayed at home in bed. He said he would not go anywhere in the rain.
BBB: I understand him.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №85956
 22.08.2013
A good antivirus copes with all kinds of threats, does not inhibit the computer and does not exist.

[ + 51 - ] Comment quote №85955
 22.08.2013
Title: Opening of the Metro in Omsk

"...In Omsk opened the first metro station!..."

The commentary:
There are at least two metro stations.

[ + 34 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №85954
 22.08.2013
Turn off the light (in the luster 5 bulbs, and will be turned on by one switch). I started to fall asleep... My wife was doing something in another room. Through the dream I hear:"LUMUS MAXIMA!!" and what do you think she did?

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №85953
 22.08.2013
xxx: I have always been so amused by the "force majeure circumstances"... It is stated that they are natural disasters, hostilities, etc. And that if they last for 3 months, the parties agree on a solution. I can imagine two blushed men in costumes sitting on the neighboring roofs of a half-sinked city, and shouting, “What will we do?”
I can't get rid of this obsessive picture in front of my eyes.

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №85952
 22.08.2013
My husband and I went to one of the old castles. We climbed the wall and looked at the surroundings. And in the courtyard of the castle a bunch of ten-year-olds in knightly coats and with swords run and scratch each other (they had a sports camp there).
We look at all this, we embrace and I say to my husband, “We are a prince and a princess with you, and this is our army,” and after a second with my husband the choir sadly says, “Daaa, the fucking army we have.”

[ + 47 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №85951
 22.08.2013
Collection of old photos of children in the courtyards and sports. “Thank you Comrade Stalin for our happy childhood.”

The Camel:
The guys! Believe me, we had a wonderful childhood, we played covers. The Cossacks thieves. In classics, they chased the great ones. In winter skiing and skiing. In schools there were all sorts of circles of sections - I can not even say what a child would like to do and could not be able to engage in photography, aviation modeling, astronomy, sewing, sewing. Bicycle and ballet. We drank clean water from under the crane, we breathed fresh air, we ate a real doctor’s sausage, we had a natural and delicious ice cream, and the bread is no longer baked, and the joy of our grandchildren is now. comp.chupa-chops.chips powdered milk juices.collapses without meat.snickers with GMOs.water from the store....Children are now allergic.diabetics obesity- nothing will please them.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №85950
 22.08.2013
I stayed home alone for a few days. Mom calls, among other things reminds me to check the entrance door (there is a mistake behind me, I constantly forget to close it). I look at my reflection in the mirror: on the face - a mask of marble color, on the head - a towel wrapped (under it a hair mask), from the clothes on me wearing only wool golfs of a purple color (cold), underwear, huge dog boots, the whole body uniformly poured with flour (cake I cook). I admired this beauty and went to check the door. If the thief comes in, he will see me. It will be a pity...

[ + 26 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №85949
 22.08.2013
from the company Adobe. My translation is mine.

Question: Part of the year I live in the United States, the rest is in England. I want to buy Adobe Photoshop Elements. Will I be allowed to download a program on two different computers?

Adobe Answer: Are you the only user of these computers? If so, you can install the program on both.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №85948
 22.08.2013
Do I not sleep with the hero?
XXX: Is this from the hero I eat?
Yyy: The unreleased fat?
XXX: The Lunar Hero?
YYY: So did you meet?
XXX is very pleasant. The monitor of the warmeshine stumbled.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №85947
 22.08.2013
I'm so cynical that I can only call a prostitute and then play blackjack with them.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №85946
 22.08.2013
In the publication "The boring botan" the girl asked to help with the chart y=(x^2+3x-4)/(1-x).
Three guys all night argued in comments whether this feature had a gap in the unit.
The fourth came and the phrase "which of the botans won the fight for the female" stopped the dispute.


[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №85945
 22.08.2013
Sergey Ahanovsky> EVE online game is generally the norm? Will the newcomer find out?
Nikolai Radchuk> Sergey, the game is ok. The newcomer won’t find out.

[ + 55 - ] Comment quote №85944
 22.08.2013
Theme in the forum
XXX: My windows on the 3rd floor look out on the sunny side. I want to plant under the windows, something fast-growing - bamboo probably that would close the windows from the sun.
Who has experience growing bamboo? Where to get him? What sort is needed? How to take care?
WOW: Buying blinds I understand can not offer?

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №85943
 22.08.2013
A man comes into the store and says.
I am from Ruslan.
I don’t understand and I ask.
from whom
From the Russell!
The Russo?
- Yes
I laugh, I say
How is Poseidonko?
He is confused and not so sure.
I am from Rusalko.
Yes it happens.
- Fuck me from the Russian Alcohol company, show me the vitrines!! to

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №85942
 22.08.2013
Q: Have you been to Abkhazia?
YYY: NEA
XXX: I was not...
Yyy: but I fucking fucked my grandmother, who often goes there!
xxx and how?
YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №85941
 22.08.2013
I am currently standing in a bookstore at Stephen King’s office. And here, as by chance, a lamp flashes.
Go away, you fool!

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