bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №60778
 29.02.2012
The guy snorted over my ear at night, so that I dreamed all night that I was the wife of Jigurda :(

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №60777
 29.02.2012
Fuck, you’ve gotten the shop off to me 😉
The website promises "complete confidentiality of the order! andquot;
When ordering: FIO, telephone, address, soap, ICQ, index..the order is made through Kiev online shopping service - there the status is tracked, comes SMS, mail and within 10 hours the manager connects with the customer.
Yes, all of Ukraine knows that I am buying a clap with a red hammer belt!

[ + 45 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №60776
 29.02.2012
The guy bought 2 kilos of cookies, walks around the office, feeds everyone))
A mass set on the dark side?
We call him the messenger of hell. :D

[ + 68 - ] Comment quote №60775
 29.02.2012
Wo1and: Here I look at Potter and come to the conclusion that they have all the opposition of sorcerers to the one whose stick is cooler. That is, not experience, not knowledge of spells, not the number of manas, but a stick. Freud would be pleased.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №60774
 29.02.2012
xxx: don’t call me by my full name ><
YYY : Why? Are you angry with your name?
xxx: yes
YYY: Why didn’t you change?
The others are worse.

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №60773
 29.02.2012
In contact with:
On February 29th, girls who suffer from irresponsible love, not afraid of dull views and public condemnation, can make an offer to the man they like. According to the Scottish tradition, if the elected responds with a rejection, he will have to pay £100.

That’s how you can cook.)
100 pounds = 5000 r., ten men - 50000, two hundred men - a million)) how long can the average lady attempt to round two hundred men without success? Three minutes for a man is ten hours of work, and a lady is a millionaire.
All men are closed in the basement this day)))

[ + 57 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №60772
 29.02.2012
American filmmakers who invented Watson Woman, of course, were fortunate that Sir Conan Doyle died long ago. They say he had a bad character and a big gun.

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №60771
 29.02.2012
From Japan:

As was the case at work, the guy found the feathers of feathers approached the boss and when he turned away (his hair was curly, lush) put him two feathers near his ears, his appearance immediately changed as in the best novels of Maine Reid described the leaders of Indian settlements. After the general laughter ceased, there was a short dialogue.
Boss: Vitaly, do you understand that you are now joking about your monthly salary?
Yes, they laughed great.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №60770
 29.02.2012
The morning. I sleep. My husband came from a night shift. Something is knocking at the door. I don’t open it hard (I’m completely overwhelmed!) Calls on the phone. I get out of a warm bed. I open the door, he enters and, like apologizing, without saying anything, points to the keys on the box. Mole has forgotten. The dialogue:
I thought it was you waking me up... You’re going to be me?
No, I will not...
I knew I was getting up badly.

[ + 49 - ] Comment quote №60769
 29.02.2012

I told you, how shocked the massage worker in the salon, when his massage table broke, I was sitting at his masterpiece, and I was so careless to him: the key for 10 will fit?... he is in shower: yes... I so get out of the bag I give him (I that winter with the battery was full and the key I was always with me: remove-set the accumulator)

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №60768
 29.02.2012
from habr

ad1Dima28
Something suggests me that the coil inside this thing does not radiate anything...

Freeze 28
When you listen to a radio receiver, do you also worry that it will burn your brain with its non-existent transmitter?

by Arion28
No, I’ve been wrapped up with the whole foil for a long time now.

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №60767
 29.02.2012
XXX is smart. He used to ask, “Will I drink beer?” and I answered, “A, maybe not?” and now he asks, “Will I drink vodka?” and I answer, “A, maybe better beer?”

[ + 49 - ] Comment quote №60766
 29.02.2012
I am on the bus today. I see the driver talking on the phone, first blurred the thought of the headset, and then I see the phone. in the ear. And the rubber on his head holds him.

[ + 46 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №60765
 29.02.2012
Richard Gordon: Oh yeah! I love Krasnoyarsk. Today I was approached by a guy who was brainwashing about Buddha and other Indian religions. In return, I washed his brains with a story about the God Emperor. I think he believed...

[ + 61 - ] Comment quote №60764
 29.02.2012
We have a tragedy: all the buses in the area disappeared in the morning. I had the honor of storming the route gazelle and taking it!
then placed in it comfortably in the posture of the cancer, supporting the entrance door with a butt (which was extremely useful for the door, since before that it was held on the same shovel)
What a coincidence. I was driving in about the same position, but the door wasn’t opened at all because of me, and all the stunners at the subsequent stops were forced to wash.))) and also... a Negro was lying on me!
I have to admit that you’ve driven a lot more exotic!
WOW: It was strange.
xxx: by the way, the route minibus (which runs on Moscow transit tickets and categorically does not take standing ones) stupidly stopped at our stop, full of fresh-frozen citizens, to land ONE (!) passenger to the only free seat. How he was wrong! Within two minutes he carried not only standing, but also hanging and lying. He was barely put down himself - because there was a whole free place under him!

[ + 70 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №60763
 29.02.2012
Discussion of the new asus padphone (where the phone is inserted into the tablet, the tablet is connected to the keyboard and a netbook is obtained)

...and then this “netbook” should be inserted into the car, the car – into a combat human-like robot, the BCHR – into a spacecraft, the fighter – into a starfighter, the starfighter – into the star of death... And it would seem – a harmless smartphone!

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №60762
 29.02.2012
XXX with the oil. God keep you!
YYY: If you don’t mean Perun by God, then I have a few questions for you.

[ + 47 - ] Comment quote №60761
 29.02.2012
Publication on the main page of the city
"In Kerch held a show of hairstyles"
Future hairdressers - graduates of the Kerch Higher Professional School of Shipbuilding and Woodworking demonstrated their skills.

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №60760
 29.02.2012

Do you know:
The word “parasite” comes from ancient Greece.
So called the inhabitants of parasitaries, special institutions in which citizens lived, held for the state (public) account.

Thus e. We lived on allowance.

zzz> No According to our officials

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №60759
 29.02.2012
Disadvantages of the phone: It loads quickly
Advantages: It is charged quickly.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna