We decided once, traveling on a yacht in the autumn along the Black Sea shores, to buy fish from local fishermen. How to exchange for liquid currency.

We came to a bunch of buffers - they sit on the bench a hundred meters from the shore, the dudes are washed. We see, from the edge - the grandfather in his boat clings, trying to pull out the anchorage from under the bench.

Did you say there is a fish?
He said he raised the little one.
Can you raise a couple of degrees?
Why not give up? Subkin, of course, says when you are in trouble yourself.

They approached him and sent him the negotiator Vitashu. And Vitasya is able to replace even an adrone collider on a hammer.

While our brave sailor picked a better fish, his grandfather tried to pull his anchor from under his seat.

Vitaly chose, therefore, a fish, handed a hammer and was about to get on board, as his grandfather tells him: son, he says, help not in service, but in friendship to throw the anchor.

No question, Daddy He recalled Vital with his thunderstorm voice and with one movement pulled out the anchor, kicked him five meters away.

“Where is it? Yopt...” — shouted Grandfather and as he was in a jacket and boots jumped after him.

My grandfather gives! I was surprised by Vitaly.

You are a fool! Cap was surprised. Follow him, the bacon! He ended up in his hand!

We all jumped here. Fortunately, the grandfather quickly disintegrated under the water and was brought to us with angry eyes on board, where he was dressed in dry and in the following hours used all of our fuel for 3 days "for heating."

It is worth saying that on this day we learned a lot from our grandfather about ourselves, our parents and everyone around us, as well as about our mental abilities.

Would you cut off your finger for $100,000?
Depending on who.

From Hicks:
We and a friend in the universe somehow came up with the “Theory of the Infinite Acceleration of the Alcash.”
The point is that when Aliq is heavily swollen, it begins to move forward. In order to balance the occurring moment, he takes a step forward and aligns. But the theoretical part is that there is a certain angle at which the alchemy can no longer restore a vertical position and it needs to accelerate endlessly in order not to turn. Here is. I hope everyone understands that I’m not serious.

WOW: I’ve seen several times the alkas go out on such a corner. Infinitely accelerate them, however, interferes with cluttered legs. And the theory collapses along with the object of observation. and :)

HH: Yes, I am afraid it will remain a theory forever. XD But the spectacle is really fascinating.

xxx: The blues band requires a bassist, strictly 35+, contact icq 179xxxxxx
Yyy: Chat phone is silent
xxx the phone? How much do you forgive me?
YYY: 19 but I play the norm.

The innermost locus of control of Baron Munchausen. He also pulled himself out of the swamp, for the strong in spirit do not need points of support.

Radchand: When I was 4 years old, my parents started teaching me TB. They told me not to put any nails and metal objects in the socket, otherwise there will be a short switch.
What is a short circuit, I asked.
“Well, there will be scars,” the parents replied.
Do you? 🙂 I said.
When no one was home...
Indeed, Bach is the spark!

I live in Germany. Our neighbors, who lived on the second floor, sued the neighbors from below because they had a trampoline on the terrace and when children jumped on it, they could hypothetically look at them through the windows.

But it is necessary to pay tribute, the judge proved adequate, and in polite form sent them naked with their claims.

As an introduction, he wrote a small script, which in the for cycle summed the numbers from 1 to 5 and asked the audience what the result would be.

I said 500. Everyone in the audience laughed. Someone cried out that it would be 15. The teacher started the script. 500 server error. He missed the point.

I call the client – director of the school
I offer content filtration.
Director - Do you want to deprive the children of pleasure and also ask for money for it?

Dima Razbornov: Beeline calls for a black and yellow tree, writes "Beautiful loft, big footcourt". It’s a time of magic, I agree. What are these words, those who bow in the lofts? Only in the swing or how to get there?
Andrey Konovalov: To go to the loft, you have to make a camping-out, taking a selfie in the barbershop during the cam shoot, twisting the spinner
Andrey Konovalov: I did not try, but I read...

Set of books sold:
"Cooling for a Beginner's Wife" (Tips for Those Who Want to Surprise Their Husband)
"First Aid for Food Poisoning at Home" (Tips for those who unsuccessfully surprised their husband);
"How to Protect a Woman from Physical Violence" (Tips for Those Whose Husband Is Not Just Surprised)
"Woman and Divorce" (Advocate Advice for Wives Who Read The First Book and Began to Act)

Nature always chooses the optimal option, so there are no extra parts or parts in the human body.
Tell the Jews and the Muslims.

The admin-humorist (one who calls the server a guest) continues to burn. Recently, he almost broke the meeting with the phrase: "I can revive any old man from a guest, or from three dead I will gather one living, a month will somehow work, and then we will replace." On what the head of the department, squeezing, broke out: "Prayers to the Ktolhu are dying..."

xx: Well, I don’t even know – with tuberculosis, hepatitis and worms to crack across the border, get five wounds, but still get to South Korea, and then five hours to lie through flowing blood and survive... iron people there in this North Korea live, nothing takes them, neither worms nor bullets))
xy: The worms inside stopped the bleeding, whispering "Hold on, brother, it depends on you now we will live or die".

Discussion of the series.
Per the detective came from St. Petersburg, not from St. Petersburg?
WOW : Yes. And maybe the monument to the 1000th anniversary of Russia is not in Novgorod, but in Veliky Novgorod? Maybe Picasso is wrong to call it that. He is actually Pablo Diego José Francisco de Paula Juan Nepomuceno Maria de los Remedios Cipriano de la Santísima Trinidad Martyr Patricio Ruiz y Picasso? And we are so simple to him, panibratically, somewhere there we call the tail by name. Not well...

The little boy kisses.
Dad, I love you!
Why is?
Because you are good?
Why is?
Because you are ours!

"P" and patriotism Unconditional love for the country.

Game of Thrones is a series about how a bunch of people intrigued, fought and killed for the right to sit on a chair with peaked tops.

I am sitting at the therapist today for a medical examination from work. He asks questions:

Is there an allergy?

and no.

Do you take drugs?

and no.

Do you smoke?

and no.

The alcohol?

and yes.

I understand. Living in the Academic City, working in the institute and not drinking? I would not believe.

In my 32-33s, my mom suddenly wanted to talk to me about sex (I married at 19, divorced at 24, hadn’t seen my mom since 28). To my question with the hohote: "A hoole?!" insultedly replied that he felt a duty.

It would be good for general education on air refreshers in the toilet in addition to the composition to print, for example, theorems on geometry, Newton's laws or pages of the Russian-English dictionary.