bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №75245
 02.01.2013
A friend at the hotel serves the world youth hockey championship in Ufa:
Here stand Russian and Swiss hockey players and watch the box match in which Russian and Swiss hockey players participate. It is fucking."

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №75244
 02.01.2013
As the mother of two schoolchildren, as a driver with 12 years of experience, I beg: "Moms, dads, hang children's reflectors on their backpacks, buy winter things with tailored reflectors." Really, it is scary, almost turning, hardly having time to slow down on the winter road, at 8 p.m., in the darkness, not to knock down a teenage child in all the black, running in the wrong place.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №75243
 02.01.2013
Read on the back of the tube with lubricant for anal sex: protect from children. If the child has eaten the product, consult a doctor.

It would be a consultation...

[ + 14 - ] Comment quote №75242
 02.01.2013
Twitter, 1 January, spelling and punctuation saved:

Eat everything that is not eaten. There is a job for a superhero.

Every day, thousands of girls reach the age of sexual consent. There is a job for a superhero.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №75241
 02.01.2013
Paparazzi was killed while trying to photograph D. Bieber's car. The Darwin Prize is for him. and premature.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №75240
 02.01.2013
bbb: Katya, if you don’t have a sleeve, then how will the situation change for the better if you don’t have it as a result of cutting off????????????????????????? to

Dear friend! In honor of the New Year, let save your brain! As a result of the cut - appears! They are removed by cultivation. Be happy in the coming year.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №75239
 02.01.2013
XXX: How famous are the hints of fate
xxx: Yesterday I had a new year wish, and today on the frost I broke my lips.

[ + 43 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №75238
 02.01.2013
I still have from the younger classes of the school roots of Gosha. He has a sister Katya. They were 7-9 years old. Once their parents went to the country, and they stayed in the city with their grandmother. On the country grew some amazing and special strawberries, fantasticly tasty, but unharvesting - for the season 3-5 kilograms were removed. Well, the grandmother informs that the parents in the car have come up and unloaded, and they have a bowl of strawberries with them. Well, a brother and a sister and collapse with a gallop on the street (9th floor). Katyue was lucky, throwing her shoes and into the elevator. Gosha had the habit of walking around the house in cowards, while his pants were stretching, the doors of the elevator were already closed. Gosha was a sports boy who ran down the stairs. He would just run past the elevator, but his mind worked. On each floor he did not let go of pressing the call button, Katya had time to get to the car at the moment when Gosha was squeezing the last cubicle in his mouth.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №75237
 02.01.2013
The Client: Hi
Client: Can you help?
Customer: what amount should be placed on the account in order to withdraw 620 y.e after 3 years, provided that the amount of the deposit is charged with interest at the rate of 9% annual
Support for: Hi What are you?
Client: Please Decide, Financial Mathematics
Client: Unfortunately, this is not part of our responsibility. Try to decide on your own.
Client : (I do not know
Client: I have an exam
Sorry, but I have a job.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №75236
 02.01.2013
I have only one known native Moskvich, and that is my cat.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №75235
 02.01.2013
X: Maybe we should rent an apartment to take care of the beautiful sex?
YYY: Well I don’t know. How to divide the quarter pay?
X: How is it.
X: by the number of days spent in the room)
YYY: You are laughing? I will not build an apartment.
YYY: Oh sorry) I didn’t mean that.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №75234
 02.01.2013
Homa: Such a feeling that following Santa on December 31, January 1, everyone was flying and bitten by Petrosyan, and now everyone turns into a turn of humor.

[ + 14 - ] Comment quote №75233
 02.01.2013
Another epic of female logic.
With his wife in the hyper before the NHS
I: I bought a bowl of caviar, I don’t know, can I get another?
Wife: As you want, I don’t like caviar.
I took one. I love forelac more, but the NH without olive, champagne, mandarines and sandwiches with caviar is not the New Year.
The New Year. I bring a plate with butter. The wife immediately pulled.
You don’t like the oak, right?
I don’t like caviar, but I like sandwiches with caviar so much.

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №75232
 02.01.2013
A recursion nearby. I read the manual for pills "Nurofen". Indications of headache. Side effects: headache

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №75231
 02.01.2013
HHH
Rolling Stones did not easily settle Gary's persecution into such a family. Everybody hated them from the beginning.
HHH
This uncle is a bitch, he is a bitch, sells drills. Do you understand?

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №75230
 02.01.2013
From a conversation with a girlfriend: My relationship with sex was not fine from the beginning. It started with our first acquaintance. I didn’t like him then. Now he is avoiding me.

[ + 35 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №75229
 02.01.2013
I put Iroquois. I read thematic websites. The most severe Russian punks, it turns out, recommend the lacquer "Pretty"...

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №75228
 02.01.2013
XX: estimate how many games I have in the steam
Xy: Nothing for yourself!
Xy: Boy, when are you living at all?

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №75227
 02.01.2013
I am 33 years old, neither grandparents nor parents are alive, so I want to meet NG with them.
And with sweets.
Appreciate relatives and relatives.
MAXS_S

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №75226
 02.01.2013
The student dining room taught me three useful things: 1) skillfully enter without a queue; 2) send those who enter without a queue; 3) grab yogurt with a fork.

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