bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №154018
 05.04.2020
I came to ask for your daughter’s hand.

Do you have no hands?

Yes, but she is tired.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №154017
 05.04.2020
In January, everyone wondered: what will the Year of the Rat bring us?

And only historians knew that rats usually bring plague.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №154016
 05.04.2020
Which ear to learning is deaf

A classmate in the sub-Moscow physical school, after her graduation arranged in a taxi. And not in the Moscow taxi park with great earnings opportunities, but in the Mytishchynsk. He drove people on the route of one of the city buses there and back. They were attacked by bandits. They threw a string behind and tried to stifle. I saved a little bit. He responded in time, put his hand, turned away. He suffered heavily - one ear was completely cut, one half, the tip of the nose was still stuck and the fingers.

The broken ear was swallowed, the tip of the nose was blinded by a new one, we have another classmate - the chief surgeon of the district hospital. The second, I couldn’t do it.

Such this surgeon with the help of some there artist on dental protheses licked him polyurethane no worse. On the type of the current double scotch.

So Andrew, sitting behind the wheel, sometimes forgot about such a prothesis, led him to scratch, his ear rolled away, which led him to anger. And with the words "wow, shit" he threw him over the torpedo.

Two night passengers came out of the window.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №154015
 05.04.2020
Putin comes into the bar and says:
All beer at the expense!

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №154014
 05.04.2020
At what age did you kiss for the first time?

YYY: at 23

ZZZ: 22 for you

YYY: But I very hopefully

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna